posted by Sun T. on Mar 9
When you said “I do” did you really understand what you were agreeing to do? Did you truly understand the implications of all the statements that were said? Some of the most common words spoken are these:
“Do you promise to love and cherish her/him, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her/him, for so long as you both shall live?”
Do you promise to love? Well, love is a choice. After all the fluttery butterfly feelings and sweet nothings in the ear, love is a choice every moment of every day. You have chosen to love this person no matter what… That discludes sex. Why? Sex fades, as does beauty. Love is not sex, no matter what many may think or say. When it all fades, when twilight has crept in…will you still be able to LOVE the other person?
Sickness could mean anything from the common cold to a debilitating disease to a coma. Could you seriously stick by someone who is unable to care for themself? Could you really take the time to dress, bathe, and feed them if the time came? What about sickness of the soul? Could you survive through that? Would you be able to pray your spouse through?
Poorer could mean anything from living paycheck to paycheck all the way down to homelessness. This could be related to the spirit, as well. When their self esteem is bankrupt or they are insecure, can you hold them up until they become strong again?
Let us not forget richer. Too many people get money and get divorced because they think they have found something better than the one who has stuck by them through it all.
Forsaking all others is not just about cheating. It’s about making the choice to put your family and their welfare first no matter what the circumstance. It means that they give up their friends if you need them more. It means you would do the same. It means that you would make sure that your family is okay before you take care of your other family (mother, brothers, sisters…etc).
As long as you both shall live could mean the next few seconds to the next hundred years. All this through the slings and arrows of life…whether there be tragedy or stress or supreme happiness. This is a doozie for the simple fact that it binds your spirits and souls nigh unto eternity.
This is why I said I would only get married ONE time, if I ever got married. I can only promise these things to one man. I can only be responsible for loving him, cherishing him, putting him above all others…(except God, of course). I can only be true and faithful to him. I can’t be running around putting everyone before him. I can’t be acting single and new when I have a family to take care of at home. I have to take care of home and family FIRST. And neither can he.
This is why it’s so important to know what it is that you are agreeing to before you stand in front of that judge or pastor, those witnesses, and God and say “I do”.
Tags: wedding+vows, marriage+vows, wedding, marriage, sanctity+of+marriage
